Bo Outlaw Momentarily Ecstatic Upon Reading Travis Outlaw Signs With Portland

Free agent power forward Bo Outlaw felt his heart momentarily leap from his chest Wednesday as he read about the Trail Blazers re-signing small forward Travis Outlaw to a three-year deal. The spontaneous joy lasted only a few seconds, however as he quickly realized his error.

"I'm sad to say that it wasn't the first time I've made this mistake," a despondent Bo Outlaw remarked by telephone from his Orlando home. "In the 2003 draft, I thought for a split second that I had somehow been re-drafted. I know what you're thinking, but that instant is inescapable. I mean, it's just not a common last name."

When asked about his own prospects for the coming season, Outlaw muttered something about retirement before trailing off into unintelligible ramblings of the 1999 "Heart and Hustle" season during his first stint with the Magic.